Septic tank or flank? What’s better?

A very strange fellow named Frank

Couldn’t resist a good bottom spank

He tried it on me

so I jumped off his knee

but he caught me on the flank

OR (So I hid in the septic tank! LOL Like this version heaps more!)

A Close Shave for a Naughty Slave

There once was a naughty slave

Whose Master looked seriously grave

He tied her up tight

and try as she might

never again did she forget her close shave!

Ode to Titty’s Chitty Ditty

OK, so my luvvlies, here is another kind of meme thing, which will haunt you for the rest of your days. My first attempt at the Limerick-Off! Clears throat.

There was a wee girl named Titty,

Who wrote a daily, quite awful, wee ditty,

She published her post,

Then went to make toast,

and returned to a cheeky chitty!

Well, don’t say I didn’t warn you…

Something that springs to mind is that Enid Blyton must have known what she was doing when she named her characters, Fanny, Dick and Titty – surely?

Thursday Thunks: Cantankerous ankles?

Q: Does Barbie have kankles?

A: I have no idea what kankles are, but yes, I am sure she does have them. She gets around quite  a bit, our Barbie.

Cantankerous ankles? (I like that much better!)

My WIP

No, I haven’t misspelled the word whip, although that could be wishful thinking. WIP stand for my Work in Progress. If you look in the third column (right hand sidebar) you can see a cute little cartoon character I have added to show you the current word count for my “main WIP”. Even though I have added 4 more progress bars in the centre column, the cheeky chappy on the right should make more progress on a daily basis; if I am sticking to my routine as I should be.

Well, that’s the plan. And just like the A Team, I love it when a plan comes together, so lets hope it does. Otherwise, both sets of cheeks will become slightly flushed and that is something I am really trying hard to avoid.

I can’t sit down and write if I can’t sit down, can I?

Angels & Demons Call for Submissions

This seemed quite appropriate. So, I thought I’d share it.

Angels for whom heaven is not enough. Demons searching for redemption in a mortal’s arms. Seraphim, nephilim, heaven’s warriors or creatures from the pits of hell—love could be waiting for them all.

Samhain Publishing invites you to step into the light or embrace the forces of darkness with stories of angels and demons from any mythology. Will your angels be wicked and your demons be wanton? Only you can decide on which side of heaven or hell they’ll fall.

Samhain Publishing is seeking submissions for their Spring 2010 demons and angels themed anthology.

Stories can be of any genre or heat level, and submissions are open to M/F, M/M, or multiples thereof, but all submissions must feature either an angel or demon theme (or both!) as integral to the story. Submissions should be 20,000 to 30,000 words in length. Submissions are open to all authors previously published with Samhain as well as authors aspiring to publish with Samhain. Submissions must be new material, previously published material will not be considered. Additionally, manuscripts previously submitted, whether individually or for past anthologies, will not be considered either.

Please be aware that manuscripts submitted to this anthology cannot be resubmitted at a later date unless by invitation from an editor. However, submissions with merit for possible publication at Samhain are and will be passed to interested Samhain editors even if not chosen for the angels and demons anthology.

Chosen manuscripts will be published as separate ebooks under their individual titles in Spring 2010 but will be combined as one print title for Winter 2010 print release.

To submit a manuscript for consideration please include the full manuscript (of 20,000 to 30,000 words) with a comprehensive 2-3 page synopsis in addition to a letter of introduction/query letter which details the genre, heat level and story length. Full manuscripts are required. As well, when you send your manuscript, please be sure to use the naming convention Title_AngelsDemons_MS and Title_AngelsDemons_Synopsis. This will ensure that your submission doesn’t get missed in the many submissions we receive, and makes it easy for me to find in my ebook reader.

Submissions are open until November 1st and final decision will be made by November 16th. Submissions and questions can be directed to Angela James at editor@samhainpublishing.com Please put Angels and Demons Anthology in the subject line.

**permission to forward granted**

What have I been up to?

Oh, yes, I have been a busy girl! Here are my latest book reviews.

http://tjbook-list.blogspot.com/2009/05/review-savoring-temperance-by-brenda.html

http://tjbook-list.blogspot.com/2009/05/review-l-word-by-amanda-m-holt-extasy.html

http://tjbook-list.blogspot.com/2009/05/review-persian-girl-by-felix-baron.html

http://tjbook-list.blogspot.com/2009/05/review-amandas-young-men-by-madeline.html

http://tjbook-list.blogspot.com/2009/06/review-prize-by-kira-chase-extasy-books.html

http://tjbook-list.blogspot.com/2009/06/review-hidden-enemies-by-ravyn-wilde.html

Angel

X

I have a plum!

Well, I told you I had many fingers in many pies and that I’d let you know when I pulled out a plum. I’ve just heard that my poem The Mating Ritual of the Lessor Spotted Dick has been accepted for publication by the magazine Sliptongue. As you can tell by the title it’s rather a silly ditty, but when I tested it out on a few poor souls it did make them giggle. I hope when you read it, you’ll at least be able to crack a smile.

Oh, I must make a new page for my successes, as I am determined to have many more!  How about I call it, Angel’s Plums?

One of my plums...

My Shining Halo!

Well, I am still learning the wonders of WordPress. It doesn’t quite feel like home yet, but I’m sure it will once I get to grips with it. Meanwhile, in  between my threatening to throttle Mr. WordPress and hammering away at my writing, I should now bring you up to date with what I am currently working on, since my last post was about my past shenanigans.

Yes, those days of me being a naughty little sauce pot – are well and truly over. I am a shining example of a tiny delicate creature, not unlike those dressed in white with some nice feathery wings, and that all too important luminous fashion accessory “The Halo”.  <Smiles sweetly as you take that in and savour the image.>

I’m currently busy writing stories to submit for publication.  I have lots of fingers in lots of pies…take that any way you like, I’ll forgive you. When I have some news about this, and perhaps pull out a plum,  I’ll let you know.

Proper Intro…

While I am hoping to share good news with you here, I think I’d better write a proper blog post after yesterday’s frustration with my new friend WordPress. Plus I need the practice and I won’t get that sitting in front of my computer fuming, will I?

So, let’s start from the very beginning.  What I’ve been up to in the past.

I’ve reviewed for the Erotica-Readers and Writers Association (ERWA)

I was also a TOY reviewer (grins) for Chimera.co.uk, although there is no evidence of me being there any more! Honest, I was, guv. Still, like the good girl I am, here’s a link to their spanking new site. And very nice it is, too.

Oh, yeah, nearly forgot. I had a little bit of a thing going on with Professor ‘Truly is the Devil’ Devlin. We worked on a little project together called The Spanking Mavens. Below I shall, for prosperity, add the old bio I had for when I worked with the Devil as the bottom half of The Mavens. And a link to the archives if you are interested. Don’t I just spoil you!

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Ask the Spanking Mavens!

It’s a ‘letters page’ where I’m writing it along with Devlin O’Neill, the author of several erotic novels and a self-professed expert on spanking. Okay, he does seem to know a little about it, so I thought we’d try to address some of the questions that people, me mostly, have about the art of slapping a bum. Anyone who has questions of that sort, feel free to write to me, Angelika Devlyn. Just put Ask the Spanking Mavens in the heading somewhere, so I know it’s okay to use your letter, and you can sign it with any pseudonym you like, but mine, of course.

Archives can be found here: http://www.alternative-read.com/askthespankingmavens.htm What red bottomed fun!

Gosh! The files there go way back to 2006. Doesn’t time fly when your bottom is not being spanked?